


the love in your eyes (is enough for me)

by Wtfisgoingonhere



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe-Canon Divergence, Asexual Relationship, Canon Universe, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Eren is 21, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Secret Relationship, also a bit of alcohol, and tea, because there’s no Levi without tea, but they kiss and cuddle if they feel like it, hopefully humour, it’s not a secret at the end of the fic tho, i’m a sucker for soft Levi and Eren, like i do NOT know what i’m doing, no but seriously fluuuuuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:01:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27933514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wtfisgoingonhere/pseuds/Wtfisgoingonhere
Summary: “Already?” Eren asked. “I’ve only been here five minutes.”“It’s been more than an hour,” Levi replied. “And I told you that you were late.”He got up and came behind Eren’s chair, placing a feathery hand on his shoulder. Eren tilted his head back and smiled a bit when he met Levi’s amused gaze through his fringe. The captain carefully pushed away the few strands of hair that were restricting Eren’s view, and ran his fingers along Eren’s scalp. The younger man sighed and closed his eyes to enjoy the sensation.or: the one where there is softness, Eren is a bad liar, Levi receives a love letter, and Armin nearly chokes on his food multiple times. Oh, and the two idiots are in love.
Relationships: Levi/Eren Yeager
Comments: 14
Kudos: 168





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> No angst whatsoever in this, I'm proud of myself.  
> Hope you enjoy as much as I loved writing it.  
> <3

There had been a cold wave for the past two weeks.

And a strong one with that. Eren and his friends had been in the Survey Corps for nearly six years, and it was the first time the cold had been this intense for this long so far from the mountains.

The first day, snow had fallen without a pause, and the entire castle had been frozen to inactivity. Their time had been dedicated to cleaning (on whose suggestion, Eren had _no_ idea), but when the second day the snow hadn’t gone yet, the soldiers had been given a day off. Some of them had spent it with a nice and hot cup of tea in front of the fireplace, happy to look at the covered in white landscape from the warm side of the windows. Most of the soldiers had gone outside and played around like a bunch of teenagers.

The next day, the sun had come back just enough to make the white blanket melt into something brown and ugly, halfway between mud and snow. At that point, approximately everyone had lost their enthusiasm, and the few remaining optimistic souls did so when they realised that even though there wasn’t snow anymore, the cold had stayed.  
Two weeks later, the wind was as freezing as it could get and the sun still weak. They couldn’t train with the gear for too long or their fingers would freeze. In the evening there were groups of soldiers in front of every lit up fireplace, and every extra blanket had been distributed. Nights were still freezing, though, because the castle was hard to warm up.

After fourteen days, Connie seemed to decide that it was time to take the matter into his own hands. Though he had been the first to play in the snow when it had still been here, he was now the one who whined the most.

“At least you have hair to protect your head!” He repeated. “I’m nearly bald!“ ( _Nearly_ bald, he always said, _nearly_ bald.)

So, because no one else was doing enough in Connie’s opinion, he took it on himself to bring a bit of warmth to his comrades. Which was, admittedly, very nice of him. And, as he had stated confidently, what would be better than a (secret) party with (stolen) alcohol? Another round of blanket, Armin had suggested. More soup, Sasha had exclaimed enthusiastically. A bonfire, Jean had shrugged.

_Someone to lay in bed with,_ Eren had thought without saying it aloud.

“You really need to find yourself a cap or something,” Mikasa had said matter-of-factly, “the cold must make your brain more inactive than usual.”

Connie hadn’t been deterred by their lack of enthusiasm, replying with a roll of his eyes that alcohol really was the best idea, and everybody had finally agreed (Eren would have accepted just so the boy would stop complaining all day long, but he was actually glad). Sasha had been charged with borrowing (stealing) the alcohol, and she had accomplished her mission dutifully (she really was skilled at this and Eren tried not to think about the amount of food she had stolen along the years). She even brought what she had called ‘something to nibble’, something that she had in the end engulfed within two minutes without letting Eren the chance to see what it was. So here they were, in the boy’s dormitories with two bottles of strong liquor, giggling and trying to be as quiet as possible simultaneously. The results were… not very convincing.

Eren watched his friends with a smile and wondered how it was possible that no officer had come yet to see what all of this noise was for. Next to him, Mikasa looked somewhere between amused and disgusted at the mess that had become Armin, Jean, Sasha and Connie. Eren was _definitely_ amused.

Jean looked even more stupid than usual, Armin was giggling madly at something Sasha was saying and Connie was telling a story that no one was listening to. Something about a chicken and a tree if Eren wasn’t mistaken, which he very certainly was since he wasn’t paying attention.

Mikasa hadn’t drunk, and Eren suspected that it was because she remembered that tomorrow morning was resistance training. Having to run in the nearby forest for two hours with a hangover would be literal hell.

He sighed amusedly, and tried to settle more comfortably against the bed, the unpleasant sensation of the hard floor beneath him a reminder that he wasn’t drunk either. The reason for his soberness was seating a few corridors away, probably doing paperwork at this exact moment, and Eren felt the urge to get up and go find him already. He nearly hadn’t seen Levi the entire day, and with his trip to Stohess the day before…

_Ten more minutes,_ he thought.

As much as he wanted to go and find Levi, he wasn’t impatient to leave his friends either.  
The next expedition was four weeks away. They still had time, what seemed like a lot of time. They needed the weather to be better to be as efficient as possible in the field and to be able to apply the new strategies against the titans. Since they had recovered Maria, four years ago, they went on expeditions after expeditions outside the Walls to kill as many titans as possible. Hange, who was now Commander, had come up with strategies that enabled to kill titans and preserve human lives. It was working, and well. Every time they left the Walls, they could go further without meeting any titan, and the survival rate within the Survey Corps was higher than ever.

Eren watched affectionately his friends having fun, and snorted when he saw Jean’s face, who was staring blankly right in front of him with an idiotic expression. Since they entered Squad Levi, five years ago, they never really separated. Now they were closer than ever, to be honest. Eren felt something shift in his chest as he thought that the next expedition would be the last with their squad as it currently was.

Hange’s strategies lay principally on Eren and Levi’s abilities to work together to take down titans, Levi taking support on Eren’s titan form to slay their enemies, with the rest of the squad watching their backs. The thing was, it wasn’t the most efficient way to fight, and Hange had declared a few days ago that with their experiences, every soldier in squad Levi would become squad leader. Eren understood. Instead of five soldiers around them, there would be five squads, which would be much more efficient and safe. On the other hand, he couldn’t really wrap his mind around the fact that he wouldn’t be constantly with his friends anymore. Of course, he would still see them during meals and part of the trainings, but it wouldn’t be the same.

At least, he’d still have Levi.

The two of them wouldn’t be reassigned with another squad, Hange had explained. They would just be what the Commander called an Intervention Unit, much more mobile because they would only be two.

Eren still couldn’t believe that his friends would become _squad leaders_. Seeing them like that, smiling dumbly and saying stupid things, the idea was laughable at best. But Eren knew it wasn’t fair to judge them right now. His friends really were skilled and mature enough to lead a squad (usually).

Maybe it was because they wanted to act childlike one more time together that they had decided to meet like that tonight.

Connie’s voice suddenly got louder, interrupting his thoughts.

“And then, the tree fell!” He nearly shouted, not realising that nobody was listening. “It fell and all— all that was left of the duck was a few— a few feathers!”

Ah, so the story was about a _duck_ and a tree, not a chicken.

Connie laughed madly as if he had just told the joke of the century, and the noise seemed to snap Jean out of his drunken haze.

“Remember the night of the winter solstice?” He asked suddenly, and Sasha and Armin stopped their discussion to listen.

Eren smiled a bit at the memory. Of course he remembered. It had been right after their last expedition, and because it had been a success they had been allowed to go in the nearest city for the feast (Hange had totally ‘forgotten’ to order him to come back to the castle to be locked up, what a shame). They had got drunk and stayed until late in the night. Eren didn’t have many memories past a certain hour, only the beginning of the feast when people had still been lucid, laughing and dancing at the sound of music. He also remembered the walk back to the stables they had left their horses in, and how surreal it had felt to see the streets nearly empty in the cold after having been pressed against people for several hours.  
He had woken up the next morning in a pile of hay, his entire body aching from the hangover and the uncomfortable sleep. At least he was relieved that he and his friends hadn’t tried to ride while drunk to go back to the castle.

“Everybody was either making out or getting laid,” Connie replied dreamily, having apparently recovered from his hilarity.

Eren winced. Yeah, _that_ he also remembered. Every young people around them had been kissing or dancing _very_ close to one another. He had the vivid image of those two young people who had left holding each other’s hands with stifled giggles, disappearing in the night to a more private place.

‘Ah’, Eren had said eloquently at the time as he had watched them leave, not noticed by any of his friends.  
Back to the present, Jean gestured in Connie’s vague direction with a triumphant expression.

“Exactly!” He exclaimed. “So, my question— my question is: how many people have you kissed in your life?”

Eren froze. The answer was easy (one), but one question would lead to another (who did you kiss, Jaeger?), and he had absolutely no desire to answer that second question. Not right now at least, not when his friends were drunk.

He was a bad liar, he knew, and with Mikasa not drunk next to him, he really didn’t want to be forced to lie. She would see right through it.

_It’s been ten minutes, time for me to go,_ Eren decided without having any idea of the amount of time that had actually passed. He started to get up as discreetly as he could, counting on the alcohol in his friends’ blood to make his precipitated retreat look more like a normal departure.

But luck wasn’t on his side, because his movements had caught Jean’s attention and the guy’s eyes landed on him.

A smug smile appeared on his lips, and Eren didn’t like that expression on his face.

“Ow, come on, don’t be embarrassed, Jaeger!” He teased. “My question wasn’t for you anyway, we all know that you could never kiss anyone with that face of yours.”

Eren knew better than to raise to the bait. Really, he did.

“Fuck off, horseface,” he muttered.

“Hah! Told you!” He said the other proudly. “This guy never kissed anyone, isn’t that right Eren?”

Eren winced, refusing to let himself enter Jean’s game.

“Well, you don’t need to rub it in, Kirstein,” he said awkwardly, wincing again interiorly at the completely unnatural tone of his voice.

He realised his other mistake only seconds after when there was a short silence.

“Did you just… agree with Jean?” Armin asked while Jean widened his eyes in an expression that said clearly ‘What the fuck!’

Eren groaned. Fuck, he was so stupid, of course his friends would realise he was hiding something if he agreed with Jean that easily.

“So, does that mean you have actually kissed someone?” The moron in question asked, still looking taken aback, and Eren felt a bit insulted at Jean’s genuine surprise. He bit his tongue to keep himself from answering. Now wasn’t the time.

“Who was it?” Sasha squealed excitedly.

Yeah, he knew _this_ was going to happen. Exactly the question he didn’t want to answer.  
He got up and pointed at the dark sky through the window.

“It’s late, I need to go, you know, get locked up and all,” he said and left quickly under the protestation of everyone. Once the door was safely close behind him, he leant for a few seconds on the wall with a sigh. Well, now that wasn’t subtle at all. His only hope was that alcohol would make his friends forget that conversation, and that Mikasa wouldn’t be cruel enough to remind them. Neither depended on him.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath in, exhaled slowly, forced himself to relax. A small smile stretched his lips in anticipation. No more thinking about his friends for tonight. Now, he was going to see Levi. He left the corridor where he could still hear the muffled laughs of his friends and took a familiar way through the castle. It took him less than two minutes to arrive to an even more familiar wooden door, and schooled his expression so he wasn’t smiling like an idiot.

He knocked, two times.  
There was a muffled ‘come in’ from the other side, and Eren opened the door to enter the warm light spread by an oil lamp.

He felt his entire body relax as he closed the door behind him, and suddenly the world was reduced to this room and the man within.

Levi was sat at his desk, looking up from a pile of papers. A cup and a pot of tea were next to him, probably both half empty already. This Eren knew because it was the sight he opened the door to every night. But it wasn’t what caught his eye.

No, what caused his entire body to relax, what made his heart skip a beat in his chest and his breath catch in his throat, was Levi. Always, always Levi. There was a soft light in his grey eyes when he stared back at Eren. Something like affection, care and protectiveness. Something warm, so different from the usual glare he was sending to (nearly) everybody.

Something that felt like home, something like love.

It wasn’t obvious, hidden behind an impassive mask, but it was the only thing Eren could see.

“You’re late,” Levi stated in his low, velvety voice.

Eren released the breath he was holding, and smiled. Something small but oh so sincere, something intimate he kept only for Levi.

“Am I?”

Levi nodded and placed his hands back on the desk, as if to start working again. His eyes never left Eren’s, though. Sweet Sina, how he loved being on the receiving end of that look. It made him feel warm all over, it made him feel like there was nothing else that mattered it the world than the two of them. He’d do anything for Levi to keep looking at him like that, as if he was a treasure to be protected.

He didn’t feel like a treasure, but what they shared definitely was. Being here with the dark haired man felt so comfortable, so… natural. Just the two of them.

Eren made the few steps that separated him from Levi, breaking the tension of their locked gazes. He passed behind the desk, looking over his captain’s shoulder to stare at the papers in front of him, and rested against the side of Levi’s chair.

“What are you working on?” He asked quietly, taking in what seemed to be reports from their last expedition. “Can I help?”

Levi sighed and leant against the back of his chair. His shoulder was touching Eren’s thigh, warm and solid, and the younger man savored the contact. His hand moved on its own to land on the back of Levi’s neck, softly tracing little circles on his nape, right under the undercut.

He felt Levi’s shoulder unwind under his fingers, and smiled again to himself.

“No,” the man answered, refusing his help like always. “I’m nearly done anyway.”

He nodded even though he knew Levi wasn’t looking at him. They stayed like that a few minutes, Eren enjoying Levi’s warmth against him, and Levi relaxing to the feathery fingers on his neck.

A smaller and colourful piece of paper caught Eren’s eyes, and he gestured toward it.

“What is it?”

The handwriting was small and messy, though the lines were carefully kept horizontal. It looked vaguely familiar.

Levi shrugged.

“Hange wrote me a letter,” he replied.

“Why would they do that?” Eren frowned. “They’re literally two rooms away from you at all time, except when you’re —”

“It’s a love letter.”

Eren froze entirely.

Feeling that the fingers on his neck had stopped, the older man raised his head and looked at him, a small smile tugging on his lips.

“Not like that, you idiot,” he said gently, shaking his head.

Eren would deny to his dying day that he felt relieved at that, and wondered how the hell he could have thought for a second that Hange would write a love letter to Levi. During the time it took him to get over this _not_ -crisis, the captain had bent to catch the paper and was now handing him the note that seemed to go along with the letter.

He took it curiously, not knowing what to expect from the weird look in Levi’s eyes. What was Hange up to, now?

“ _I thought one needed to show you how to write this kind of things, you dorky old man,_ ” Eren read and let out a chuckle at the nickname. “ _It could come in handy if, I don’t know, you wanted to step up your game with a certain handsome young man,_ ” he continued, trying to hold in his laugh. “ _If you need someone to edit your letter or if you need further advices, know that I’m always at your disposal. Your favorite Commander, Hange._ ”

By the Walls, Hange was really something. Eren couldn’t restrain his laugh any longer when he saw that Levi had crossed his arms and looked annoyed.

“I don’t know why they thought I should need an example, I’m perfectly capable of writing my own letters if I want to,” he said, and if Eren didn’t know better, he’d think that Levi was pouting. But Levi didn’t do pouting (he _did_ , but Eren remembered the day Levi had punched him when he had implied it). “Besides, who the fuck tries to seduce someone with a love letter anyway?”

Eren set the paper back on the desk where Levi had taken it, still smiling.

“Says the guy who spent about ten minutes doing a little speech about… What was it about again? You know, your speech the first time we held hands,” he teased.

“Shut up,” Levi growled.

Eren resumed his movements on the other man’s neck to show he was just teasing, and smiled fondly at the memory he held dear in his heart. He actually remembered the entire thing pretty well. How could he forget a word of the clumsy, awkward and ridiculously long speech Levi had delivered that time? It had been surprisingly sweet, even though months later Eren was still confused about the thing and didn’t understand what had been the point of it. Levi had rambled about not wanting to scare Eren off, the color of his eyes, and how his cleaning abilities were not so bad, all at the same time and so clumsily it had made absolutely no sense.

He loved that memory to pieces, and Levi knew that, but… Well, Eren _loved_ to tease Levi

“That’s good news, I suppose,” he added after another long and quiet moment, his fingers now climbing to caress the undercut. “It means nobody found out about us.” He let out another small laugh. “Not thanks to you, though, if Hange thinks you’re pining after me.”

This time, Levi turned his head to glare at him.

“Shut up and let me work,” he muttered but there was something fond in his tone that said he didn’t regret his obviousness (obviousness was a big word, but Hange was observant enough for Levi’s a little too long gazes toward Eren to be considered obvious).

Eren smiled again, and moved to the chair across the desk while Levi picked up his pen.

“Yes, sir.”

He sat down with a content sigh and stretched his legs under the desk, his feet finding Levi’s and nudging them softly. The man didn’t look up from the paper, but set his own feet around Eren’s ankles.  
The younger man relaxed and closed his eyes, lulled by the scratch of Levi’s pen and the occasional sound of a tea cup being moved.

He loved those quiet evenings. Just spending time in Levi’s presence was enough to make the world look a little brighter and much, much warmer.

After a while, he realised the pen had stopped scratching. He opened his eyes to catch Levi staring at him with an odd expression. He didn’t look away when Eren met his gaze.

“What is it?” Eren asked, a bit curious.  
Levi looked at him a little longer, before shaking his head lightly and returning to his paperwork without saying a word.  
Eren nudged Levi’s ankle, still pressed against his own.

“I missed you too, you know,” he said with a small smile.

Levi snorted, pointedly keeping his gaze fixed on what he was writing.

“I was only gone for one night and one day.”

Eren bit his lower lip, remembering how alone he had felt last evening when Levi hadn’t been there. The man had needed to go to the nearest city for a meeting with the MP, and Eren had felt a bit lost, not exactly knowing what to do with himself after dinner. It was the first time in weeks they hadn’t spent the evening together, and the first time in months Levi hadn’t been the one to lock him up.

“Still,” he persevered. “I missed you anyway.”

This time, Levi looked up briefly before resuming his work, and Eren knew that even though the man wouldn’t say it, he had missed him too. It was all Eren needed to know.

Because he didn’t like the lonely feeling in his belly, because he wanted to give himself something to do, and because he was, at heart, a jerk who liked to tease the man sat across from him, Eren got closer to the desk and snatched the cup of tea away before Levi could stop him.

The cup was hot from the liquid inside, and Eren felt grateful for the warmth. The room wasn’t cold, but the sound of the wind outside the window and the memory of how it had felt crawling between his clothes during the day was enough to make Eren crave for heat.

He took a sip from the cup and nearly burned his tongue. It tasted as good as it smelled, though. As always when Levi prepared it.

“Disgusting,” the man in question muttered. “I drank from that cup, you know. Now I’ll need to take a new one.”

Eren shrugged.

“I drank from the other side,” he replied like always in this situation, knowing that Levi didn’t mind as much as he pretended to. It wasn’t the first time Levi scowled at him and drank from the same cup two minutes after. Always on the other side, though. And Eren always had a handkerchief to dry where he had drank from. There were limits, after all.

Levi rolled his eyes but didn’t add anything, returning to his paperwork. After nursing the cup for a few more seconds, Eren set it back where he had taken it from and leant back against his chair.

His eyes fell again on the letter Hange had written, and another small smile tugged at his lips. Sweet Sina, _Hange_. He wouldn’t tell Levi, but knowing that he was obvious enough for them to realise something was going on made him feel warm all over.

He nudged Levi with his foot in another swell of affection ( _love_ ), and the captain nudged back immediately. It felt so natural, between them. Those little contacts during the evening. A touch of the hand here, their feet intertwined, their shoulders brushing together when they were sat on the sofa. The looks, too. Or the way Levi would stare at him silently sometimes, or when he would look amused because of something Eren had done or said. Their proximity, both physical and emotional, was all Eren wanted and more.

Sometimes, they kissed. Not often. It felt… strange, to kiss Levi. Definitely not unpleasant, but… well, Eren didn’t exactly know. He was just more comfortable with smaller contacts, or with cuddling when Levi felt like it. He knew it was the same for Levi. But they did kiss, sometimes, when they were both in the right mood, when there was a tension between them that wouldn’t go away with only cuddling or holding hands. They kissed when they came back from expeditions, both alive and unharmed. They kissed when Eren was feeling depressed because he still had to be locked up and it was the burning reminder that there was a monster inside him, or when memories that should have stayed hidden came a bit to close to the surface. Most of the time, they kissed when the feelings in their belly were too intense to be expressed by stares alone.

Today, Eren knew, wasn’t a day of kissing. It was a day of gentle nudges between their feet, it was a day of running his fingers in Levi’s hair, it was a day of breathing together and feeling like it was enough. And it _was_ enough.

He looked back at Levi, observing the relaxed line of his shoulders, the slight frown between his brows that he always had when he was focused. Eren realised that a while had passed since Levi told him that he was nearly done with his work. He wasn’t getting impatient, enjoying the quiet of the room and the familiar and soothing silence, but he wished Levi would let him help. He kept on offering, and Levi kept on refusing, always saying that it was his responsibility, and that Eren had other things to think about than boring paperwork. Eren would reply that it wouldn’t bother him at all if it meant it helped Levi. Levi would cross his arms and look annoyed, not accepting discussion.  
The next night, Eren would offer again, and Levi would roll his eyes.

Not that Eren wasn’t perfectly happy with having the opportunity to stare at the handsome man across from him for long minutes. His eyes roamed around the familiar face, the perfectly cut hair, the thin and expressive eyebrows, the grey eyes that looked blue from closer and that held so much softness when they wanted to, the shape of his nose, lips, neck, his broad and solid shoulders. Shoulders he knew he could always lean on if he needed to.

Eren thought back to Jean’s question earlier: _How many people have you kissed in your life?_

One. And it would stay that way.

“People are going to find out, eventually,” he spoke up.

Levi didn’t answer right away, finishing writing whatever it was he wrote under every report.

“Hange is being suspicious of you, and my friends are starting to get curious,” he continued, thinking of the way Armin had looked at him like he was faced with a fascinating enigma.

Levi signed at the bottom of the page, before placing down his pen and leaning in the backrest of his chair with a sigh. He studied briefly Eren’s expression, before raising an eyebrow.

“Do we care?”

Eren chuckled because that was such a Levi-like reaction.

They hadn’t exactly taken the active decision of keeping their closeness a secret. It had just… happened. They were both quite private men when it came to that sort of things, and weren’t exactly comfortable with public displays of affection. And both weren’t exactly enthusiastic at the idea of being on the receiving end of the knowing looks and endless questions of their friends. It had been a wordless agreement between the two of them.

“I don’t,” Eren replied eventually after a short reflexion. He wouldn’t make a great announcement, but if his friends learnt the truth at some point (and they would), then so be it. “Do you?”

Levi snorted as if the very thought was ridiculous.

“No.”

Eren smiled.

“Okay, then. We’ll just see what happens.”

Levi nodded and drank the rest of his cup of tea, ignoring Eren’s knowing smile at that. He shot a look at the clock on his wall, and Eren noticed the brief tensing of his shoulders.

He refused to read the hour and pouted when Levi looked at him with the familiar gaze that said ‘I’m sorry but it’s time to go.’

“Already? I’ve only been here five minutes.”

“It’s been an hour,” Levi replied. “And I told you that you were late.”

He got up from his chair and came behind Eren, placing a feathery hand on his shoulder. Eren tilted his head back and smiled a bit when he met Levi’s amused gaze through his fringe. The captain carefully pushed away the few strands of hair that were restricting Eren’s view, and ran his fingers along Eren’s scalp. The younger man sighed and closed his eyes to enjoy the sensation.

“Come on,” Levi murmured after long, blissful seconds. “Tomorrow night I’ll have more time. We can play chess, if you want.”

Eren brightened a bit at that, and opened his eyes to meet Levi’s gaze again.

“Great,” he said. “I’d like that.”

Levi hummed, and Eren almost whined when the warm fingers left his hair. His reaction must have been obvious, though, because when he stood up, Levi was smirking.


	2. Chapter 2

The next day at breakfast, Eren was in an excellent mood. The reason was sat across from him, looked like a horse, and was absolutely hungover.

“Hey, horseface,” he smirked, “you know we have resistance training this morning, right?”

Jean groaned, and kicked Eren in the shin when he laughed at his reaction.

“Fuck you, Jaeger.”

Connie, who was in approximatively the same state, was also unusually silent. Armin stared at his breakfast dubiously, probably weighing the pros and cons of eating: he’d need the food for training, but it wouldn’t do good to his certainly aching stomach. Mikasa looked the same as usual, but that wasn’t surprising because she hadn’t drunk.

Sasha was engulfing her breakfast with the same enthusiasm as always. Eren was always surprised by her resistance to alcohol and hangovers. After a few years, he had just learnt to accept that: Sasha was the kind of person who could eat tons without gaining weight and drink liters of alcohol without having hangovers.

Apparently, only her, Mikasa and himself would be in satisfying form for training this morning. It was fine by him. It meant that his friends surely didn’t remember the discussion they had started when Eren had left (fled) the room.

He might be fine with them learning about his relationship with Levi, but he didn’t want it to happen because of a drunken discussion.

Thinking about him, Eren looked across the mess hall to find Levi sat next to Hange, just like every morning. Things to discuss about the organisation of the day, he knew. Most of the time, they both sat so that they could see each other. At least Eren did, like the idiot in love he was (he wasn’t ashamed to admit it), and most of the time Levi happened to be placed at the right place too (completely by chance, of course). Only at lunch and in the evening did Levi eat with his squad.  
Eren briefly thought about how much would change once Sasha, Connie, Jean, Armin and Mikasa would have their squads. Would they still eat together? Damn he was going to miss those idiots.

He met Levi’s gaze and it shook him off his suddenly nostalgic thoughts. The two of them would still be together and his friends would never be too far. It was all that mattered.

Ignoring Hange next to him, Levi raised an eyebrow, and Eren knew he was curious about the obvious and far from shining state of his squad. Eren shook his head slightly with a discreet smile in response to Levi’s silent question. The captain would understand soon enough, and Eren knew he wouldn’t be pleased. On the other hand, his friends would probably do their best to hide their hangover, and maybe they’d succeed to be convincing enough for Levi to let them be. Tonight though, when it would be just the two of them, Eren knew the subject would come up, no matter how good at hiding it his friends were.

Well, about that… He looked back at the tired and moody Jean in front of him, and at the groaning Connie at his side.

“The captain’s coming,” he said suddenly as seriously as he could.  
The effect was immediate. His two friends who couldn’t see that Levi was still sat next to Hange straightened up immediately with a panicked expression on their faces. Connie slapped his cheeks to look more awake (it didn’t work) and Eren couldn’t hold back his laugh anymore, revealing his little joke.  
Jean kicked him in the shin again, hard.

“Ha fucking ha.”

Eren laughed harder.

***

At noon, Eren wasn’t laughing anymore.

Apparently during the long (excruciatingly long if you asked Connie) footing this morning, his friends seemed to have recovered their memory of last night. And with it, the memory of the _conversation_.

They were sat for lunch in the mess hall, and Levi had just left his seat at the head of the table (right next to Eren) at a gesture from Hange. He had muttered something about them interrupting his meal, but had stood up right away. Across Eren, Jean seemed to think that it was the perfect opportunity to raise the subject again.

“So, Eren,” he started, and the young man knew he was in trouble when Jean didn’t use one of his nicknames. “I believe that you left last night without answering one of our questions. And a very interesting one, with that,” he continued with a smug smile and a raised eyebrow.

Eren held back a sigh. Why hadn’t his friends drunk more and forgotten everything?

He met Jean’s gaze and hold it firmly.

“I told you, I never kissed anyone,” he insisted, not expecting it to work. But he could try, right?

“Yeah, yeah, enough with your little lie already,” Jean rolled his eyes.

“Come on, you know you can tell us,” Connie added with a casual shrug that didn’t hide at all the curiosity in his eyes. He was sat between Jean and Mikasa, and the three of them were gazing at Eren insistently. It was making him nervous.

Of course he knew he could tell them, he even had Levi’s approval. But he didn’t feel like dropping the bomb in the middle of lunch. He wouldn’t know how to say it anyway. On the other hand, his friends wouldn’t let him escape like last night. He opted for a compromise.

“Alright, alright,” he sighed. “Yeah, it’s true, I have already kissed someone. Who it was is none of your business.”

Sasha squealed excitedly and bent over to see Eren across Armin’s plate.

“I knew it! Who was it?” She asked, completely ignoring what he just said.

Eren simply shook his head and looked down at his plate to resume eating, ignoring the red that creeped on his face. It earned him disappointed groans from everyone at the table, except from Mikasa who had gone back to eating normally.

“At least you can tell us if it’s someone we know,” Armin bargained. From the sharp intake of breath before he talked and the tone of his voice, Eren could tell that Sasha had just elbowed him in the ribs to make him find an argument.

Eren shrugged a bit too casually, trying not to think that it was, in fact, someone they knew pretty well.

“Ehm… maybe,” he admitted after a hesitation.

He then proceeded to take a sip from his glass to hide a bit of his redness, because there was no way he’d let his friends (and Jean above all) know he was embarrassed.

Bad idea.

“Tell us now, Jaeger,” Jean threatened, “or I won’t shut up when the captain comes back. You don’t want him to know that embarrassing experience of yours, now, do you?”

Eren choked on his water as Jean smirked, smug.

_Fuck you, horseface._ He couldn’t say it with his throat still clogged with water, but he thought it hard enough that he was sure Jean heard it.

Next to him, Armin tapped gently on his back, and Eren recovered his breath difficultly. At least now he had an excuse for his red face.

It was the moment Levi chose to come back, and Eren thought that the timing was just his luck.

Levi sat down, and looked at Eren questioningly when he saw the redness of his face and noticed the sudden silence at the table. Eren looked down at his plate, embarrassed, but relaxed when he felt the tip of Levi’s boot against his. Now Levi was here, and they had decided only the night before that it didn’t matter if their friends discovered it anyway.

“What is going on, here?” The captain asked, and from the way he was sat a bit close to Eren and eyed him discreetly, the younger man knew Levi had more or less guessed what was happening. Maybe the red face was a good indicator too, he admitted.

Jean straightened in his seat, catching Eren’s attention, and he wondered if the bastard would really have the courage to speak up. Of course, Jean and his other comrades weren’t intimidated by Levi as they’d been in the beginning. But sometimes they still seemed to be hesitant to talk about some things in his presence. Like, for example, their love/sex life. Levi was still their superior officer, after all.

It was probably the reason Jean thought it would embarrass Eren to speak about it in front of him. (Really, it had the total opposite effect, because now that Levi was here Eren was significantly less nervous.) Unaware of that, his friend opened his mouth, closed it again. Now Levi was getting impatient.

“Spit it out already, Kirstein,” he ordered, annoyed by the wait.

“Well… We were wondering if Eren had already kissed someone, and who it was if he did, sir.”

Holy shit, he was actually going for it, Eren realised.  
At his side, Levi froze, probably in the same state of mind than Eren. Their gazes met, and after a few seconds the younger man shrugged slightly in a ‘why not?’ kind of way. He was actually curious to know how his captain would choose his words, and now that he wasn’t the one that needed to speak, he felt more amused by the situation than nervous.

Levi seemed to hesitate, searching in Eren’s gaze as if it would give him the words he needed. Before he could say anything, though, Sasha spoke again.

“Was it Historia?”

Eren snapped out of the bubble created by his silent conversation with Levi, his brow furrowing in confusion.

What the fuck? _Historia?_

“Really?” Connie asked, before looking thoughtful for a second. “Actually, it would make sense,” he shrugged. “So, was it her?” He looked back to Eren expectantly.

Eren simply stared at them. _Historia_ , of all people? Next to him, he could feel that Levi had frozen again, and if he wasn’t so confused and caught off guard, he’d have found it funny.

“It would make se— what the—” he stuttered before interrupting himself, shaking his head firmly. “No, it wasn’t Historia, for fuck’s sake!” He exclaimed, his voice a bit too high and avoiding Levi’s gaze completely.

_Historia_. Yeah, she was beautiful, and kind, and had a strength in her he admired, but she wasn’t exactly his type.

Sasha seemed to think otherwise, though.

“Huh,” she said, disappointed. “Blonde, blue eyes, beautiful, she must be your type. You look like someone who likes sweet and small people.”

Eren let out a disbelieving laugh.

“By the Walls, Sasha!” He exhaled in a chuckle, before daring a look in Levi’s direction. He laughed again more sincerely when he saw the man looked horrified. If it was because Sasha had thought of Historia immediately, or because of her remark on ‘Eren’s type’ he didn’t know. But now that he felt a bit more confident, Eren was really enjoying himself. And because teasing Levi was always too much fun, he couldn’t help but say “Sweet and small, you say?” He marked a pause, and Levi’s eyes snapped in his at the playful tone of his voice. “Actually, you’re right, that’s pretty much my type,” he deadpanned, staring at Levi right in the eye.

Levi’s eyes widened, not an ounce of amusement on his face, and kicked him under the table. Eren groaned in pain and bent to rub his aching shin, wincing.

“You’re dead, Jaeger,” Levi scowled, glaring at him like he hadn’t done in a long, long time. Eren smiled at him playfully in answer, meeting his gaze again, and was preparing a sassy answer when Armin choked on his food next to him.

Worried, Eren turned around to see his friends coughing and staring at Levi with eyes wider than plates. Oh. _Oh_.

He tensed and glanced at the captain, realising that his last comment had been enough for Armin to understand. Levi scowled at him even more before leaning against the back of his chair with his arms crossed.

“Well, it didn’t go as expected,” he muttered, and Eren relaxed again when Levi placed his foot back against his. He wasn’t angry. Just annoyed (pouting).

“You… you…” Armin tried, voice rasped.

“Yes,” Levi nodded.

“Oh my god,” Armin succeeded to utter before having another coughing fit.

Eren placed a hand on his friend’s back in comfort and chanced a glance at his other friends. Apparently, Armin was the only one that had put the pieces together, because Jean eyed Armin and Levi successively, trying to understand, and Connie looked down right annoyed. From where he was, Eren couldn’t see Sasha but the absence of sound was a good indicator that she hadn’t understood either. Mikasa was still eating, and had nearly finished her plate.

There was a moment of silence, just the time for Armin to regain a bit of his composure.

“Do you… do you know about it, sir? Who it was?“ Jean finally asked. Armin let out a pitiful sound at that and coughed again a few times.  
Eren was now _definitely_ amused.

“I do,” Levi answered calmly, his arms still crossed firmly. The very tip of his ears was red though, Eren noticed, only exterior sign of his embarrassment.

Jean stared at Eren dumbly, trying to put two and two together.

“You— You told him,” he stated, having apparently a hard time imagining the conversation.

Eren smiled, and moved his leg so his knee was touching Levi’s.

“I didn’t need to,” he said with a calm and confidence he was far from feeling. “He was there.”

Levi snorted and Jean paled. At this point, if he hadn’t understood, the idiot was faking it, wasn’t he? Whether it was because he was incredibly dumb, or just for confirmation, Eren would never know (he had a strong opinion on the answer though). But Jean turned and looked back at Levi, still pale.

“You were there,” he stated again.

“Of course I was,” Levi deadpanned. “Did you think Eren was making out alone?”

Armin squealed at the choice of words, Connie nearly lost his eyes from how much he opened his eyelids, Jean looked like he was about to pass out and Sasha down right screamed.  
Knee still pressed against Levi’s, Eren was laughing, and his captain was smirking.

_Sweet Sina_. His friends were ridiculous.

There was the sound of a fork being calmly settled on the table, and all eyes turned to Mikasa who looked exactly like she always did. She shrugged under the sudden attention.

“What. We all knew this was going to happen at some point, don’t look so shocked,“ she said simply.

Connie looked at her as if she had just grown a second head.

“No. No, not all of us knew. Holy shit.”

Mikasa shrugged again.

“Eren’s had a crush on the captain for years now. Nothing no one can do about it.”

Eren turned red, because damn, Mikasa was right, but she didn’t need to expose him like that.

He felt Levi’s knee nudging his and glanced at the man next to him. The man looked amused, raising an eyebrow in a ‘is that so?’ sort of way. Embarrassed, Eren crossed his arms and tried not to pout.

He was relieved though about Mikasa’s reaction. He had feared it more than the others’, to be honest, because of her past… _wariness_ around Levi. He should have known that things had changed now. The two of them, they weren’t the best of friends, what with their mechanical reaction to scowl at everything and everyone and to (nearly) never smile.

But, in the end, they were starting to accept they were family, and respected each other deeply. Most of the time, Eren could even say they cared for each other, and not only in the ‘you’re in my squad so I need you alive for the sake of our missions’ sort of way.

It was nothing but adorable, the way they would behave when they were alone together, or nearly alone. Clumsy and awkward, with definitely a lot of glaring and scowling involved, but adorable.

Well, maybe his opinion was biased. Mikasa was his sister after all, and Levi was… Levi. And everything that touched even remotely Levi was in Eren’s eyes either adorable (though he’d never tell the man that), or beautiful, or admirable (that last part he told him often just to see what shade of pink Levi would turn that day — there were many shades of pink his face could become, he had discovered).

He realised he had been staring fondly at the older man for a bit (entirely) too long when Levi cleared his throat. Eren schooled his expression immediately and leant back in his chair, avoiding pointedly to look at his friends, whose silence was becoming awkward.

“Training’s in the forest in thirty minutes,” Levi announced eventually. “Bring your 3DMG and don’t be late.”

He gathered his cutlery and with a last look to Eren, left the table. Eren watched him go, feeling suddenly nervous again without the soothing contact of Levi against him.

The door of the mess hall closed behind the captain, and there was a second of stunned silence.

“Well, shit,” Jean muttered, and suddenly all hell broke loose. Everybody was talking at the same time, trying to be louder than the others so Eren would answer them first.

“For how long has this been going on?”

“Why didn’t you tell us?“

“Oh my god Eren, did you fall on your head?”

“What the hell. What. The. Hell. What the actual hell is fucking happening.”

The last part was Connie’s words. He was staring blankly at the chair Levi just left, looking so lost and confused it was hilarious.

Eren laughed a bit and forced himself to relax. These were his friends, and he knew everything would be fine. Of course, they were surprised (euphemism), but there was nothing else to it.

But his friends were still asking him too many questions at the same time, and suddenly he remembered why he hadn’t wanted to tell them immediately. He would never get out of this room with his dignity unscathed.

“Shit. You. In a relationship. With _Captain Levi_.”

“Oh my, Eren, did you two… Did you, you know…”

“Wait, don’t answer that!”

Eren didn’t know who was talking anymore, his entire face redder than a tomato. Damn, this was so awkward. And why did everybody have to make everything about sex anyway? He and Levi… It wasn’t like _that_. Most of the time even kissing was too much.

Mikasa suddenly stood up and it seemed to make every body freeze, bringing a blessed silence on their table.

“Eren. Out.” She ordered. “I need to talk to you.”  
There was a look in her eyes that said she wasn’t joking around and that he’d better obey quickly. He started to gather his dishes, but Mikasa shook her head.

“Now. Sasha’ll bring back your plate for you, won’t you Sasha?”

Sasha nodded nervously and Eren sighed before following Mikasa out of the room under the worried/disappointed/both gaze of his other friends. Well, he _had_ hoped that Mikasa’s reaction would be good. To be honest, he wasn’t too disappointed to leave the room now. Dealing with one person at a time was still better, even when that one person was _Mikasa_.

As soon as the door of the mess hall closed behind them though, Mikasa’s tensed shoulders relaxed, and she let out a sigh.

“Ehm… What’s going on?” Eren asked, confused.

Mikasa crossed her arms and nodded toward the door of the mess hall.

“We’d never have got out of here in time if I had let them ask their questions,” she said. “Also, you were already redder than a tomato after one question, and it was painful to watch.”

Eren stared at her blankly.

“What. You’re not going to… I don’t know. Yell at me, or something?”

Mikasa looked at him weirdly.

“Would it change anything?”

Eren shook his head. She had a point.

“Thought so.” She glanced away from him for a few seconds, before meeting his gaze again, a little uncertain.

“But. Are you… Ehm. Are you sure? About… about it, I mean. About him.” She asked, and Eren finally relaxed.

There. There was his sister that he loved to pieces and that worried for him just a little too much.

“Yeah,” he said fondly, thinking about grey eyes and warm hands with a soft smile. “I am.”

Mikasa nodded.

“So go find him, and tell him that if he ever hurt you, I’ll tear him to pieces. Make sure he understands.” Her voice had taken a lower tone and there was a flash of something in her eyes to show him she was more than sincere. Eren laughed and nodded.

“Right, I’ll tell him.”

She waited for Eren to go away a few steps before calling him again.

“And Eren? You owe me a favor,” she stated, “for helping you escape. Don’t forget it.“

Eren smiled again, feeling another swell of affection for his sister. Sina, he loved her.

“Of course. Thank you, Mikasa,” he said sincerely.

And because after all Mikasa was an Ackerman and she _couldn’t_ show her embarrassment, she just turned around and left. Eren watched her go back in the mess hall with a smile. He stared at the door for a few seconds, before shaking himself.  
Right. Levi.

He quickly went back to the basement to take a coat that would protect him from the cold, before going to the armoury where were stored the gears and the gas. Levi was there, already fully equipped and reloading his gas tank.

The man’s gaze softened when he saw who was standing at the door.

“Succeeded to escape their questions, I see?”

Eren smiled to hide his embarrassment at the reminder of his friends’ words (for Maria’s sake, what the hell had run through their minds?!) and entered the room fully, heading to where his own 3DMG was stored.

“Mikasa helped me out,” he said, still finding the words unreal on his tongue. He looked back over his shoulder and smirked. “By the way,” he added, “she told me to make sure you know that if you hurt me, she’ll ‘tear you to pieces’. Her words, not mine.”

Levi snorted, standing up once he was finished loading his gas and leaning against a wall (not before making sure it wasn’t filthy).

“I knew that the first day I met her,“ he replied, looking back as Eren crouched to load his own gas tanks. “In the courtroom. Had she had the occasion, she’d have killed me that day. Tried to, at least.”

Eren laughed a bit.

“Yeah. She’d have.”

They stayed silent for a long time, Levi watching Eren, Eren focusing on what he was doing, the both of them listening to the familiar swoosh of the gas going from one container to another.

“How were the others?” Levi eventually asked, his voice carefully neutral.

“Shocked,“ Eren smirked, thinking of Connie’s face. He knew he would tease the (nearly) bald boy for months with that. “Nothing they won’t recover from,” he added after a moment.

“Good.”

When he was done, Eren also stood up and turned around, his gaze immediately meeting Levi’s. He read the silent question in his eyes, a quiet ‘and you, how are you?’ and smiled reassuringly in response. Yeah, he was okay, more than okay. Relieved, too.

“I’m glad they know,” he confessed, “and I’m glad you were here to tell them with me. It made the entire thing more enjoyable. It always does.“

Levi’s shoulders seemed to relax, and suddenly there was so much unguarded affection in his eyes that it made Eren weak in the knees.

“Ready?” Levi asked, voice soft, eyes warm.

Eren swallowed, a bit overwhelmed by the way Levi was looking at him right now. He knew Levi was only talking about training, but damn…

“Always,” he exhaled, and it was the truth.

Levi stared at him for a few more seconds before heading to the door, but Eren hastened his pace to catch his arm. The other man turned around and observed him questioningly.

Eren swallowed again, unable to look away from the light in Levi’s gaze.

“I love you.”

Levi’s eyes widened a bit, caught off guard. He searched in Eren’s gaze for long seconds, as if he could find there the answers to all his questions. Slowly, with hesitant fingers, he placed his hands on Eren’s neck in a soft caress, and pulled down gently to press their foreheads together.

Eren closed his eyes, lost in the softness of the moment.

“I know,” Levi murmured, voice raw with an emotion he couldn’t—didn’t want to hide. He breathed out slowly, before repeating, “I know.”

Eren smiled.

That afternoon, they would go and train with the rest of the squad. He would fly around the forest with his friends under Levi’s experimented gaze and do his best to learn the new move their captain would show them. At some point, when the both of them would be alone in a quieter part of the forest, Eren would ask Levi to _show_ him the moves. Levi would smirk and roll his eyes, but would go to Eren all the same and place the younger man’s body in the right position with careful, feathery touches. Later that night, they would eat together in the mess hall and talk with the rest of the squad. If Levi was in a good mood, he’d say a few jokes and Eren would laugh, loud and bright. All along, their feet would touch under the table. Later again, they would retire to Levi’s room and play chess, game after game, until Levi would look apologetic and Eren would understand it was time to get locked up. He would try to put off their separation as much as he could, and if he played his cards well they’d end up cuddling on the sofa for another ten minutes.

And all along, as Levi would look at him carefully during training, as he would observe him discreetly during dinner, as he would stare at him openly during their games of chess, his eyes would say that he loved him back.  
It was all Eren needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How these boys succeeded to keep their relationship a secret I do NOT know, they're just so *obvious*


End file.
